If you're a man, cover your ears...
It's Day 5. My milk has come in and I'm able to successfully feed Perseus now. The first few days were very difficult. Two cracked nipples and one swollen hard breast in conjunction with a difficult to establish and extraordinarily painful, toe curling latch made the process very frustrating. I nearly broke down into tears at two in the morning on Day 3. Perseus wouldn't stop crying and I couldn't establish a good latch. After an hour and a half we finally had success.
His pediatrician is concerned that I may not be producing enough or Perseus may not be feeding often enough. We're watching his weight closely.
It's gotten easier over the last two days. We're both learning and are establishing a routine. He and I are both actually sleeping for two hour intervals through the night now! I love the bonding as well. I swear I could just hold him for the rest of my life and be content. Unfortunately, my breasts, my nipples in particular, are still incredibly sore, and cracked.
Assvice requested.
Tuesday, January 6, 2009
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111 comments:
No assvice here, but I'm so happy that you and Perseus are getting along well.Well done, young patawan.
Oh I hear you on the pain. I cried many times as well while trying to establish a good latch. Assvice? Lansinoh helped a lot, and wearing only the very softest-fabric tops I had for several weeks (banishing all bras!). Courage: it does get easier, and IMHO it is so totally worth it.
Congratulations again on your wee one!!!
Lots of Lansinoh, lots! And as expensive as it is, I really didn't think the generic worked well at all.
And if he's still having problems, consider calling a LC. Sometimes I think that mine literally saved me.
I had tons of crazy horrible engorgement and I had to use some warm compresses before nursing (to loosen things up), nurse, and then ice. It was a ridiculous routine but it only lasted a few days
Wish I had something else useful for you. But for me, nursing was the absolute hardest part of childbirth and the part I felt most unprepared for, that no one really talks about. It was not natural for us and took a lot of work but now that she's 4 months, it's SOOOO worth it.
Best of luck with it!
Lansinoh ointment on the nipples really helped me.
My son lost weight while I was in the hospital (I was there for 5 days due to a c-section) and even after I got home I was convinced he wasn't getting enough to eat because I never felt like he was "emptying" me. But, his weight plateaued, then he started gaining, and he gained something insane like 6 lbs in his first 6 weeks!
The La Leche League forums are a great source for advice, and they can also put you in touch with local BF gurus.
The first 10 days were really hard for me. After that, it was bliss. My only assvice is don't give up. (Easy for me to say, I wasn't parenting on my own.)
I did use nipple shields briefly and it seemed to help with the painful latch. I know "they" say it's never supposed to hurt, but I have truly never talked to a single person who didn't admit that it does hurt at first, which is really hard when you've already had such a painful thing happen to your 'downthere'.
Have you learned to nurse lying down because THAT is incredibly important. It's about the most relaxing thing I can recall, ever, laying in bed with my baby, him nursing and me reading a book. Everyone said I wouldn't be able to read anymore once Gabe came - but truthfully I read more books that year he was born than any other. (He loved to nurse, though. He loved to nurse and would nurse for hours if I let him. Some babies won't do that.)
Lansinoh ointment and a Lactation Consultant appointment. Or, better yet, a doulah who will come to your HOME and help you there (for me, The Boy always nursed perfectly in the LC's office, then we'd get home and all hell would break loose.)
Good luck.
I agree with the lansinoh! Bf was always so tough for me at first, too. Now that your milk has come in Perseus should gain the weight. Be hesitant to listen to a ped who tells you to supplement right away - let you and your son get the nursing down first!
And a lactation consultant can be your best breast friend right now!
Oh, but be warned: Lanolin stains, so don't wear your favorite bra and/or shirt without a breast pad. For real.
Fish lips.
Seriously. That's what the lactation consultant told me at the hospital: the baby's lips should be pushed out like a fish - if not, use your finger to break the latch and help the baby by helping him get his upper and lower lip up and around the nipple. (This is so hard to describe via blog comment!) So his lips should be curled up and around the nipple, not "tucked in."
I don't know if that helps at all! But it helped me tremendously.
And remember, nursing is hard work, so give yourself a bit of a break, ok?
The Lansinoh saved it for me too. I had such engorgement there wasn't any looseness for my babies to latch on to (think of an over full balloon) I had to use a warm compress and hand express for a minute or so on each side to soften things up. It did only last a few days until my body regulated my supply. Once the nipples heal they become slightly calloused and it gets easier I promise. The only other issue I had that was truly tough was plugged ducts. A hard lump and engorgement are sure signs of it. I just had to get in a hot shower and massage the lump and express and empty the breast, very painful. A waste of milk, but really that kind of pain can make you crazy. I hope it continues to go well.
I agree with all of the above, but I will also second the shields. When you have cracked, bleeding nipples the only thing that helps heal them fast is temporarily using a shield. My pediatrician who is also a LC is the one that told me about it (you might hear to NEVER use a shied, ever, though-- I find this to be silly. It's the only reason I was able to nurse Tori for 21 months). Just use them for a bit to let yourself heal and to help train his latch, and you'll be good to go. I did not find this caused nipple confusion for Tori--like I said, she nursed until 21 months using shields, bareback, and bottles when I was at work. She knew what was what when it was in her mouth.
:)
Sunshine every day!!! They need sun, seriously. Like 10-15 minutes if you can spare it will really help toughen them up and make them more adaptable. I swear by it and my midwives taught it to me.
soothies gel pads. they carry them at cvs. call me if you need specifics.
check out kellymom.com-- a great site for bf advice of any kind--
also-- I think it is all about the latch-- it is really important to get their bottom lip curled outward--instead of inward-- the jack newman breastfeeding book is great about showing that--
I would just say bf as often as possible and make sure you aren't doing too much-- esp. the first two weeks--
I didn't use lasinoh-- but just put breastmilk on my nipples--
also-- breastmilk is the best for diaper rash--
I feel you... lots of air is good, I also found success with Lansinoh.
I agree with Elizabeth, totally worth it in the long run IMHO.
Try not to worry about his weight too much. You'll be ok!
and a good LC and LLL have lots to offer
I am so proud of you for continuing on with the breast feeding.. the first few weeks ARE miserable..no doubt about that.
What I used (sheesh almost 22 years ago for my first son) were dampened tea bags... just dampen them with warm water and stick them between your nipple and the breast pad.. Works wonders for the pain! I believe it is the tanic acid in the tea? Anyway..give it a try if need be.
Your doing great....and once again congratulations!
Jo
These previous comments say it all. :)
Lansinoh, Lactation consultant or postpartum doula's are fabulous.. and yes to the fish lips. Although I never got the chance to breastfeed, as a doula I've helped others and fish lips are key to a good latch. Make sure he opens wide like a yawn before latching. Good luck!
Lanisoh, and if it works for you, a nipple shield. Some think that they cause decreases supply, but if they create a good latch and good feed, then they can actually increase your supply.
I had latch issues as in she wouldn't latch without one. (for the whole 18 months I fed her)
The above information is not true for everyone, but the dear wonderful priceless NP & lactation consultant I saw gave me assurances that the new silicon ones are fine for supply.
Crazy about the Lannsinoh here! Used it both times. Warm compresses and lots of determination.
And - if your nipples get to a place where they can tolerate it...pump after you feed to increase your supply.
You are doing an amazing thing for both of you!
A&D ointment. Its cheaper than Lansinoh and works as well. They no longer recommend it because some women were caking it on and the babies got too much vitamin D. However, since you are smart, you will be able to only lightly coat your nipples. It got me through a severely cracked nipple when my oldest was 1 yr old.
I am so glad to hear it is getting easier for you.
Oh, stand by to be Inundated!
Just remember that the pain does go away. Really, it does. The agony of that first few seconds of latching-on is terrible, I know, but in a few weeks you barely feel anything except a vague tugging. Perseus' latch will get more confident very soon, I'm sure: he is a fair few days short of term, and even some full-term babies are pretty slow to catch on about how to serve themselves a drink. If the latch feels wrong, shove a finger in his lip-seal, and start again. Pure lanolin ointment I found useful - it's dreadful stiff yellow sticky stuff when you first smear it on, but the heat of baby's mouth soon warms it up and works it in. I found that if Harry's latch wasn't perfect, the ointment helped him work himself onto the boob a bit better - some of the smoother nipple creams seemed to make him slide right off.
It's a bit early to be offering bottles when he's just getting used to what nipples are all about, but some gentle pumping might help heal your cracks?
OK, I'll say it - Lansinoh is crap. It did nothing for my cracked and bleeding nipples. Do you have access to a lactation consultant? There is something called nipple cream that has to be made by a compounding pharmacy (ie, actually mixed together by the pharmacist) that is a miracle cream.
Here's the kelly mom link:
http://www.kellymom.com/newman/03b-treatments_sore_nipples_breasts.html
The thing is you have a wound, and if you're nursing every two hours, there's no time for the wound to heal.
If worse comes to worse, I can mail you my barely used tube - a couple of days and I healed. (and I never touched it with my fingers, used a q-tip to apply, no double dipping, so despite this sounding gross it would actually be sanitary).
Kelly mom is a great resource. Also AskMoxie.
Nursing is HARD work, in the beginning. Get help before giving up, because it does get better. Hang in there.
And look - crying is perfectly normal in the early weeks. Hormones are a bitch.
Your nipples will become numb over time. Just be thankful Perseus doesn't have teeth yet!
Breastmilk. rub it on your nipples after every nurse. and on anything else you need healed, lol.
I agree with the lansinoh - it helps. Also, try a different position because Perseus might "rub" a different spot so it isn't so painful.Laying down worked well for me.
Absolutely no assvice for you as I've never nursed or really done much as far as helping someone else to do so. Just wanted to let you know I was thinking of you and hoping things go well with the nursing. Hugs to you and to Perseus.
Congratulations, Antigone. He's amazing.
Assvivce RE: breastfeeding (didn't read through the other comments, sorry if this is repeated!) = OUCH. give yourselves 6 weeks to adjust to your new feeding styles. Drink a huge glass of ice cold water (through a straw works best while nursing) while he latches, and as long as you need it.
Air out when possible. Use excess breastmilk as a lanolin/lotion on cracked & sore nipples.
Sorry for your pain, I totally know the feeling....YEOWCH!
Hang in there. You're doing it ALL RIGHT!!!
He'll get enough - supply & demand, relax, eat oatmeal, drink lots of water, rest, blah blah blah...go with your gut.
Most of all....ENJOY HIM! :)
Lansinoh didn't work for me either.
Gel soothies are awesome.
Warm compresses helped me let down - I never let down with my first child and it was horrible. I had no idea what let down felt like until the second and then when I did I realized what was wrong during the first!
I had to supplement with both kids. It was fine. Some rabid-beastfeeders freaked out. Pooey! My kids took breast and bottle equally just about from the beginning, it was nice. I just didn't produce enough even with pumping.
Laying down was much better than any other way for the latch for us.
Don't really have advice since I wasn't successful, but compared to the many horrible breast feeding stories I've heard it sounds like you're not doing too bad! It's only day 5, most people seem to say this takes weeks to get figured out. It's great that you're trying. Does the hospital have breastfeeding classes for new mothers? Don't be too hard on yourself. And congrats on the beautiful boy!
Don't doubt yourself and your ability to feed you baby. Ditto on the Lansinoh. After the first 6 weeks, it gets so much easier.
Fresh crisp cabbage leafs in your bra while you're not nursing.
If it hurts, break the latch WITH YOUR PINKIE and try again, compress the breast really hard and make sure he gets a good mouthful of breast.
Don't move the breast to the baby, not even one inch!! move the baby to the breast. That's hard, but it's essential.
We used the shield because mine was too small (the baby AND my nipples) but I'm not sure I recommend it. It's a pain and it's hard to get rid of afterwards.
You are doing a terrific job. It's very hard at first, don't doubt this for a minute. But it will get easier, I promise.
Fenugreek tablets help with milk production. Lots of water too.
When you're not nursing, make sure you place around lots of glasses of water so they're handy for you when you're stuck in a chair nursing.
I really hope you have someone helping you there...
btw my hospital had breastfeeding clinic in it, I was there very, very often at first.
As long as the baby has at least 6 wet diapers in 24 hrs (write them down eh?) you're doing great.
I nursed for two years. Lansinoh is definitely the way to go. Best stuff out there! I didn't have latching issues, but did have the cracked, sore and (sometimes) bleeding nipples and wanted to give up a few times.
One thing that helped me was pumping a little between feedings (did you get that pump back yet?) For me, it wasn't as painful as the nursing, and it helped me get a good supply in. That way, I could give him a bottle when I was really sore to give myself a break. Some people will tell you this causes nipple confusion, but we didn't have an issue with it. Up to you.
Try the football hold while nursing too, that helped. Changing position will drain various ducts more and keep you feeling less painful.
I agree with most of the assvice I've already read. Lansinoh did help a little, but when the damage is internal, it doesn't do much good. I had a brutal time BF my baby because her first latch did so much harm, but I kept going and it got much much easier. My assvice is this, get a second opinion regarding your supply, etc. from a lactation consultant before you discontinue or change your feeding methods because I find docs are not as supportive or as understanding of BF as they could be (obviously there are notable exceptions). There are herbs and drugs to help with supply.
As for the pain, it does get better, especially if your latch is good. Flanged lips, lots of areola in the mouth, bringing baby to breast, not vice versa, tummy to tummy (depending on position), tongue down. It's a lot to remember at first, but once you've got it down, it "should" be easier.
If it turns out that you have to stop for any reason, please do NOT beat yourself up about it. Perseus will be fine.
its a marathon, not a sprint. its ok to pump and bottlefeed or use a shield. wont ruin the bf relationship and will help preserve your nips for later use.
No one really tells you how incredibly painful BF can be, or at least you never imagine it do you? Definately lube up before and after you feed. Keep the nipples moist. If the pain gets to be too much when he is latching, stop and pump on the breast that is sore instead while it heals. He still gets the milks and you get a break from the pain.
Motherlove makes a great organic nipple cream and there are others to choose from. Also, try not to let yourself get engorged before he latches on, that makes the pain worse. If you are, express some milk out first, then feed away.
And, most of all, it takes a few weeks to really get the ehole thing established so be PATIENT with yourself and him. And in the end, if it becomes too hard, formula is there and Perseus will be just fine if you choose to use it. Don't let anyone guilt you into thinking anything different.
Good luck:)
Oh and there are supplements you can take (fenugreek) that increase your milk supply, it does smell a bit but you get used to feeling like a piece of licorice, and there are several organic teas that help increase supply as well. If you want names,let me know I'm using one now that really has helped.
I tried the Lanolin ointment (brand name is Lansinoh) but I found that Calendula ointment worked better for me. Lanolin is a bi-product of wool-making (is that what it's called, because you don't really MAKE wool) and calendula is from bee's wax and flowers. Calendula has a bit thinner consistency and thins even more when it touches your warm body. Both are safe for baby but I liked Calendula because it didn't hurt so much to put on.
The 10 days are really tough until your nipples toughen up a bit. After that you could have a man suck on them and you won't feel a thing. ;)
Using breast shells over your nipples (to keep all fabric off of them) in between nursing sessions will help them heal. When Perseus is (temporarily) satisfied, apply some Lansinoh and stick on the shells. It worked wonders for me.
Good luck to you - this is the most challenging part of the newborn phase, but once you've established a solid and comfortable nursing relationship it is SO wonderful!
Sounds like you are doing a great job. Remember, they give the baby 2 weeks to get back to what he was born at, so weight loss is expected. Don't let the doctor talk you into supplementing until you've done your research on it. With hormones, and it not being the easiest thing, some doctors will just tell people to supplement when maybe they don't need to resort to that yet.
I liked the Lansolin brand nipple cream the best. Put it on before AND after feedings. It's natural and ok if the baby gets some. Eventually, your nipples will get a tougher skin, but it probably takes about a month, maybe less. Don't wear bras. I like just wearing tank or camisole tops when you're lounging around the house. Also, with the latch, make sure he is putting the whole areola in the mouth, not just the nipple. He needs to open really wide to do this. I know the first time, we were having difficulty and the nurse finally said to really shove his head into it and after that, he latched and no more pain. Also, don't nurse more than 20 min per side, save the boobs! And lots of water makes lots of milk.
Also, usually you can go back to the hospital and see a lactation nurse to help make sure the latch is on right. Over the phone consults are harder.
Keep it up!
There is a book "the womanaly art of breastfeeding" by La Leche League that I found especially helpful
Lots of cream, keep rubbing in on like you have chapped lips with lip balm.
no assvice from me, but I'm glad your milk has came in finally and you're breast feeding well. Give it time, I'm sure even more milk will come in the more you two are at it.
Ditto all them on the Lansinoh (saved my life) AND figuring out how to nurse lying on your side. Then you can both fall asleep like that in the middle of the night. Bliss. So much easier than sitting up, arms and back tired, with the Boppie pillow.
I know! In the breastfeeding class I took it made it seemed like you just hold the baby in the right position and it's all good. They NEVER mentioned the pain. The only advice I have is to give it time. I nursed both my boys for a year each and the second time I thought I knew what I was doing but I still got blisters! But we nursed through the pain and it got better. Good luck and congrats!
Get help if you need it and take the one week strategy. My husband and I agreed on waiting to stop breastfeeding for a week. If a problem wasn't resolved in a week we might really need to stop but in reality most problems are way better in a week. And doing it for a week is doable even in pain but thinking about oh my god I need to do this for 6 months at least was teriible.. I fead both for 16 months..
Lansinoh never did much for me but with my third child the LC suggested expressing some milk and spreading it around the entire aureola before nursing--this makes your skin nice and slick, so that even if Perseus does come at you with a less-than-perfect latch suction will help draw more of the aureola into his mouth (and make any lip-positioning you have to do, like pulling his lower lip out from between his jaw and your breast, a lot easier). That and remember that his chin should be pressed against your breast--my LC would shove the baby at me and go "chest to chest and chin to breast!" because he really does need to be facing you to avoid an uncomfortable angle that will cause him to pull at you while trying to straighten his neck and the chin thing helps you get the right angle. Good luck!
Cabbage. Sounds crazy but a cabbage leaf in each bra cup provides a lot of relief. Keep it in until it wilts then replace.
Other than that, just wait it out - it does get better!
I used this nipple protector, I think it was Gerber brand. It was in a stick that you smear on your nipples. It was a life saver since Marjorie had such a strong latch and was STARVING all the time. ;) It also does not contain lanolin, which can be irritating especially if you have any issues with wool. I kept that stick by my side wherever I was going to nurse her. I would put it on immediately after every nursing session.
I can pick you up some and send it to you. Email me your address to my work email.
I was in incredible pain for the first 10 days or so. I cried -- literally cried -- every time I breastfed my now 3 1/2 month old son. My breasts continued to hurt for another two weeks after that (though not quite as bad), then all of a sudden, quite miraculously, the pain stopped. My nipples finally got used to the constant assault :)
Early on when my nipples were cracked and bleeding, the lactation consultant I saw told me to let my nipples air-dry in between feedings and to put some polysporin on them. I did that -- and I made sure I washed the nipples very well with just plain water before feeding the baby.
The other thing that helped was placing a warm cloth over the breast and nipple before feeding him. That softened the skin and allowed the milk to flow so that the initial latch wasn't so excruciating.
I really hope you'll feel better soon! I know that some women never stop feeling pain, no matter what they do, and my heart goes out to them. I hope you will be like me, and the pain will eventually stop completely.
When I left the hospital the midwives said that while I was feeding, to just let the other breast drip if I was home and could manage it. Apparently it helps with engorgement because the milk is coming out, but without any nipple stimulation, so it doesn't make things worse in the long run.
Heat before and ice after. A good quality lanolin cream (I'm in Australia, so I don't know the brands there). Letting your nipples air dry also is better for cracks than just packing the boobs away into your bra. I spent lots of time topless, or near enough in the first 3 weeks.
I was also told sunshine, but was living in the city at the time and didn't really feel like flashing every single person walking past. It's winter there right, so sunshine probably isn't all that available anyway.
And finally, vitamin C will help you heal faster. Aweseome stuff. (To eat I mean, not to apply)
I am so thrilled to bits for you, even though I am just a lurker.
I didn't read all the comments, maybe someone else suggested it: a thing that worked for me was to keep the baby, whole body of him, agaist me. I don't know if I explain well. When I started, only his head was turned towards the breast, the body was facing the ceiling. When my mom told me to keep his body facing my body it eased a lot. Anyway, good luck, and if you are strong enough to pass the first month there shouldn't be any problem. Thinking of you both!
Tea Bags!
Every chance you get steep two bags, fill the tub with soothing warm water, soak the nether regions while you rest two tea bags on your sore bits...then at some point you look down at yourself there in the tub and must laugh!
First off, You are doing a great job not matter what you may think... Second, don't listen to the ped. about weight gain this early. It is completely normal for a newborn to lose up to a pound in the first week. Not to mention all the weight charts are based on formula fed babies, which does not really apply to a BF one. Pay attention to the number of dirty/wet diapers, they are a better determination of feeding. The sore nipples, well I agree with everyone on the lasinoh, apply it everytime, before and after(it is completely safe for the baby to ingest), also if you are there alone with him, just go topless. The air will help the healing, and you will get plenty of skin to skin contact which you both need.
Remember, be kind to yourself, you are both new at this and with all things, it takes time to get into a workable routine. You will get there. Congratulations on everything.
I left a little bit of breastmilk on each nipple and let those puppies air out for about 10-15 minutes after each feeding. Worked wonders for the dryness and cracking. Definitely get lactation consultant if things are still difficult - well worth spending money on. There's some assvice for you :). I love it!
I don't have assvice, just wanted to say the first week was brutal on my nipples and I just stuck with it (perhaps the Lansinoh others have mentioned would have helped me -- oh well); after about a week, they ceased being a problem.
I b/f exclusively for that 1 week and then added formula on the L/C's advice because of supply problems. In all honesty my supply never got up where it should have been and I did always supplement, but at about a month the supply got a lot better than it had been and I b/f for over a year. My only point here is that despite much that is written on this suggesting otherwise, it is possible to b/f non-exclusively if that is a path you find yourself considering or heading down. In all honesty I'd have preferred to b/f exclusively myself so I'm not advocating the "partial" path over the "exclusive" path, just saying that it is another option.
Many, many congratulations on the birth of your son.
technically bf babies can take up to 4 weeks to get back to birth weight, not the usual standard of 2 weeks. Wet diapers, dirty diapers and waking to feed are more important than weight.
The advice you've gotten is great -just want to add my encouragement that it gets MUCH MUCH easier and stops hurting completely with time. Hang in there!
the best breastfeeding memory of mine.right when they latch on your let down occures and feelings of bliss emerge as your baby makes the cutest noises and you relax..:)
hugs
Wet down two unused diapers and put them in the freezer til frozen and then put them in your bra. Put cabbage leaves in your bra, I forget what they do but it helps with the engorgement pain a lot. Express milk right after nursing and rub around nipple area, or Lansinoh, it worked well for me. Try to think only in terms of the next feeding, that's it...like OK I am just going to do this one more time and then I'll see how it goes. I had to think that way for the first six weeks with number one but by the end of 6 weeks we were a well oiled machine. Good luck and you can do it!
seconding the Dr. Jack Newman's ointment...your pharmacy can compound it for you if you request a prescription from your doc.
pain in the ass, yes, but the cracks are wounds and Lansinoh (while awesome) cannot heal them on its own...the Lansinoh is best for after you get healed. the Newman's will also be more likely to minimize yeast and thus reduce likelihood of thrush, i believe.
it does get better, and eventually you can type and nurse, like i'm doing right now!
I didn't read through all of the comments yet, but if his latch remains painful and you are concerned about his weight gain, definitely see a LC. Also have your ped and/or the LC evaluate him for tongue tie. My son had one that wasn't diagnosed until he was 8 days old. His latch looked perfect on the outside but nursing him was excruciatingly painful. He wasn't transferring milk efficiently either. As soon as it was clipped (done by an ENT, took less than 2 minutes) the difference was incredible. It still took another week or so for my nipples to heal but he started gaining well and I wasn't in pain any more.
You are doing a great job!
Fenugreek didn't really work for my supply. Domperidone (available from a NZ online pharmacy) helped my supply incredibly. Don't take Reglan (the stuff that's legal here) - can cause/contribute to PPD (I found out the hard way). I used the nipple shield early on but wouldn't recommend it - hard to wean away from it and it's a big PITA. Get the Sears BF book and try all the different positions. The cross-cradle hold really worked for us (hold your breast in one hand for positioning in Perseus' mouth). Also, you can BF from both breasts lying down on a single side if you lean over when feeding from the top breast.
BF got much much much easier as time went on, and we really hit our stride at around 3 months.
Try to stick with it - it is sooo worth it. My little guy turned 2 in November and we still (both) enjoy our "snacks".
I would say a GOOD LC is a great idea. I had horrible nursing issues with my first baby. I persevered as I'm sure you will, and am still nursing him at 31 months old.
As far as weight loss, as long as it is not more than 10% of his weight (so if he was 6lbs11oz, that would be essentially stayed at 6 lbs or above), is the general guideline. Below that it is mainly a dehydration issue that they worry about at Perseus' age still.
I had cracked nipples initially and ds wouldn't latch. The nipple shield was the only way he would go to breast until he was 4 months old. The shield did help greatly with the cracked nipples (with ds2, I didn't have that issue at all).
Pump, pump, pump (if you have a chance). This really helps with supply (and engorgement, and getting a freezer supply for when you go back to work). If you think you are getting a plugged duct, pump and try to keep your breast as empty as possible (mastitis is horrible, BTDT 3 times with ds1, have not done it this time, thankfully).
I second the soothies. I love them. Lansinoh never did much for me. The triple paste did help, but soothies were my immediate comfort.
Crying randomly and everything seeming like a HUGE deal is completely normal. It will get better.
TMI coming, but I would pull my nipple out really far so it was very long, and then I latched my little one on. This way, they latched onto the whole nipple as it was pulled forward, and it hurt a lot less. Eventually I did not need to do that as she got the hang of it. People make you think that this is so natural and that the baby knows what to do when they come out, but it is not true. You both have to learn. Good for you that you are sticking with it, it gets better!
Oh and my daughters pediatrician recommended neosporin on the nipples and then wipe it off before feeding the baby as they should not injest it. That totally worked!
My LC told me to start pumping as soon as my milk came into help get my supply going which I did and I produced a lot of milk. I'd pump after the first two feedings in the morning (when my supply was greatest). I just froze the milk for later use. A friend who had supply issues with her first child seconded the "pump asap" directive, her LC told her that the first weeks of breastfeeding do a lot to set your supply, my friend also pumped from day 1 and didn't have any major supply issues her second time around.
Lansinoh helped me, like everyone else I think sore nipples are par for the course but mine seemed to be much better in about 7-10 days. Would also highly recommend LC and checking Perseus for tongue tie.
At the risk of being repetitive (I don't have time to read through the comments now), here's my "assvice." My first daughter had an incorrect latch for the first 2 weeks until we went to a lactation consultant (saved me from quitting breastfeeding). It was extremely painful and I had to stop nursing on one side and pump so that the nipple could heal. That said, when I was able to nurse again, I was encouraged to nurse her using different positions so that she would not hit the same tender spots. This was helpful and made it easier to nurse. Icing the area before nursing also helped some.
My most important assvice is not to let nursing (or rather the inability to nurse exclusively) get in the way of bonding with your child. In my experience, it is not a natural process - must be learned by both of you and sometimes it doesn't work. That's okay. You give it your best shot and that's all you can do.
I have no BFing experience myself (yet, I hope), but I have several friends who swear by dark beer (like Shiner or even darker). Drink one per day & your milk will continue to come in nicely. Have you tried a nipple shield to help with latching? That's gotta hurt like hell. I've heard just to keep with it if you can & you'll both get over the hump soon.
I had craked and bleeding nipples, plus a baby who lost too much weight and got jaundice, and those early bfing days were tough. I used Medela's nipple shells which you use between feedings. It kept my clothes from rubbing plus kept the nipple moist with breast milk. The nipples healed in a matter of days. After that I used nipple butter rather than lansinoh (which i found to be to sticky). The butter is made of olive oil and calendula -- smells yummy and feels great.
Also it took my son three weeks to get back to birth weight while i EBF. After that he just took off.
Keep up the good work.
Hi there,
I liked Motherlove's Nipple Cream for the ouchy nips and More Milk plus for milk flow. It helped. Drinking a lot of fluids REALLY helps too. I also liked Soothies gel breast pads (although a little hard to take off). I never leaked much, but a friend suggested wearing the nursing pads or Soothies for comfort. They helped.
I'm actually kinda sorry I never tried Dompimeridone to be honest. My little one has always been a big eater and I had a hard time keeping up my supply.
Enjoy your new son! What a treasure he is!
Sarah
I never got the bean to latch but I am thrilled for you! I hear that it will get easier. I am just so thrilled that he is here!!! Hooray Perseus!
Sorry if I'm repeating what others have said.
But galactagogues are your best friend if you're worried about production. Fenugreek and Blessed Thistle are the most 'famous'. But Goat's Rue and Shatavari
If your dr is really concerned and mentions Reglan, run screaming. BUT, get your paws on some Domperidone ASAP. That is a wonderdrug. Can quadruple your supply in a few days.
GL
All of the above but also drink water, water, water. And, when you think you can't drink any more, do. Good luck, you are doing fabulously!
I am so excited for you Antigone!!! These first special days with Peseus...well, I know all your days will be special, but you know what I mean!! :)
My nipples were so sore I couldn't even stand for my daughter to get near them...I actually ended up pumping (That hurt too, but not as much...I know some people say the pumping hurts more, but that was not my experience) so I pumped for the first two weeks, till my nipples toughened up and my daughter never had any trouble with nipple confusion and then once my nipples were hard as nails, from that point on she latched on and we had no problems at all..I nursed for almost a year, would have gone longer, but she weaned herself...
As everyone else has said, stick with it, these first few weeks are tough, but it gets so much better and it is the best, most easy thing in the world, plus it is FREE!!!! BONUS!!!! :)
I can't say it enough, I am SO SO SO happy for you!!!! Your sweet miracle in your arms!!!!
Praying for you both from Dallas
P.S. My daughter was still not back up to her birth weight at her two week check up, but the doctor was not too concerned, she eventually got there...she was always in the 10% for weight, but consistantly gained weight at each appointment, so the doctor said she was fine.
My only advice would be to try and avoid the nipple shield if possible. It can save breastfeeding but its annoying and incovenient.
That said, my daughter is 2 months tomorrow and the nipple shield is the only reason we are able to breastfeed. I have a forceful letdown, the only way for her to control the flow so that its not gagging her is to pull back and pinch my nipple. You can imagine what this does to my nipple. If I force her to latch properly, she screams and shoves me away, and I have to hold her head firmly in place. So we use the nipple shield, because its not worth it to do that to her.
For what its worth, it hasn't caused any supply issues.
I can't read all the comments, but I am sure you are getting plenty of good advice. All I want to tell you is that it gets better. I swear to you, it seems impossible at first, but it does get a little bit better in a few days - and much better in a few weeks. Some weight loss is normal, some discomfort/pain on your end is normal - most likely it will all fall into place if you keep at it. Your body gets tougher and adjusts, Perseus grows and learns how to latch better. Just watch his weight and his diapers over the next week or two, and keep up with it. So happy for you. It makes me so happy to think of you holding your baby!
Nothing new from me... Lansinoh, ensuring he's got a good latch, and giving your poor boobs a break are essential.
When my nipples were a wreck, I would use a nipple shield. (Also both my kids had lazy latches so it kept them interested.) They look like tiny silicone witches hats, but they work like magic. They sell them at BRU now from what I understand.
I also used breast shields (also called breast shells). It keeps anything (bra, shirt, whatever) from touching your nipples. I used to lather myself up with Lansinoh, stuff a couple of breast shells down my oh-so-sexy nursing bra, and be good to go.
I know you've already heard it 1,000 times before, but it does get easier. And, if for some reason it doesn't, then you can always quit. I know that sounds like blasphemy now, but if it gets really frustrating or painful, you have to consider your health and sanity in order to provide for him adequately. Do what is right for you and Perseus.
You're going to be stunned how much time you will now spend talking about his poop and your boobs. Rest assured it's normal. :-)
can't read every comment, or type that well, but I highly recommend anything Jack Newman writes. he has a website, and videos on youtube on how to latch a baby, and everything you could ever think of.
lansinhoh, meh, not that good for me, but you might like it. triple nipple cream was excellent. sunshine, breastmilk dribbled on the boobs, and left to dry, awesome.
soothies rock, and judicious use of the nipple shield.
Most of all, get the latch right, and you will not reinjure the tissue.
I think I still have PTSD from my BF experience, so no assvice from me. I do feel your pain, though.
I second the SOOTHIES! CVS, Walgreens, look for them in the baby section. Get two sets. Put em in the fridge, pop em in the bra, AHHHHhhhhh.
Of course, Lanolin, changing breast pads often, a good LC (or even experienced friend that can come over and look at your latch), sunshine/warm lightbulb, fresh air as much as you can. Bring P to bed and have a nurse-in, it's so wonderful!
I wasn't able to nurse laying down until my boy was a bit bigger, and I was less clumsy, around 4-5 weeks old.
If you're really bruised up, you can give the sore ladies a rest and pump. I also tried the nipple shield, but didn't have much success. Like everyone else, takes a bit of time.
I was encouraged to supplement by my LC at the hospital. I did, and continued to do so here and there throughout my 6 months of nursing. I felt a ton of guilt about it at the time, but you have to do whatever works best for everyone, and forget all the opinions.
Oh, and the warm light bulb feels nice on the nether regions, too.
Assvice: NEWMAN'S ALL PURPOSE NIPPLE OINTMENT. You should ask the ped for a prescription, and then take it to a compounding pharmacy to get filled. This stuff saved my boobs almost instantly. It has a touch of ibuprofen, which feels so very lovely on those incredibly sore nips.
more info:
http://www.kellymom.com/newman/03b-treatments_sore_nipples_breasts.html#apno
I actually have some assvice. My daughter (now 3 months old), had a terribly bad latch, and was becoming lethargic by day 5, making an already faulty latch worse - we had to feed her with a syringe while she tried to eat. We got in touch with an absolute angel of a lactation consultant who gave us a nipple shield. These are not the terrible thing for breastfeeding that they used to be, since they are just a very thin piece of silicone. They help the tiny person latch onto something a bit easier to manipulate (no pun intended), and you have less pain. We grew out of ours in a week or two. It really, really helped, and Ailey is now a nicely chubby girl. Medical equipment stores should have the shields. This is the one I used: http://www.amazon.com/Medela-Contact-Nipple-Shield-Standard/dp/B000067PQ0. It did not negatively affect my supply, and we naturally grew away from it over a few weeks. If you have questions, feel free to e-mail me - myrrh.h@hotmail.com.
No assvice either, but to say many congratulations!
Gobs of Lansinoh! I have severe eczema, and it goes to my nipples every winter that I've been breastfeeding. It also helps if I can space feedings apart more, which I realize you can't do at that age. The stuff is MAGICAL. The first weeks are so hard, but it does get better. Best of luck to you and Perseus!
Lansinoh, definitely!! He's gorgeous, thanks for keeping us updated.
Oh and warm compresses too. I haven't read all the comments yet, but if it hasn't been suggested yet, run a disposable diaper under hot water and apply one directly to each breast. Okay I know it looks weird, but it really helps to soften up the engorged breast so poor little babies get something to actually latch on to. Sorry for the visual, ladies.
N
My first wouldn't nurse if I had the slightest trace of anything on my nipples, and even washing them before nursing didn't help. The one things that didn't bother her, didn't stain,was totally natural, and that (most importantly) worked was vitamin e capsules. After nurning I would prick the end of a capsule and squeeze the oil on. I also used chamomile tea bag compresses. After a week or so everything healed up nicely and we were able to establish a comfortable routine.
It can be frustrating at first, esp when you are both crying,lol, but it already sounds like you two are figuring things out, and with Sothis there to supervise, you can't go wrong.
Now that your milk has come in, I am sure that things will move along. Hang in there. It may feel like an eternity, but it will just be a few days.
I second Lansinoh and a lactation consultant. (I still get a warm glow of gratitude when I see the woman who helped me establish a good latch with my firstborn 5 years ago.) Best advice for me was to press the nipple and areola into an oval with the longer part of the oval in line with the baby's mouth. Make sure he opens his mouth as big as he can by tickling the cheek that he has to turn to and then push your breast in quite hard so that most of the areola is also in his mouth. Your other hand should be behind his head pushing him towards you. Don't know if that makes any sense - difficult to explain over the internet.
One of the few talents I have just happens to be breastfeeding...haha..but not before I had cracks the size of the grand canyon in both nipples. I cried and as much as I wanted to nurse was on the verge of quitting, until I bought some breast shells. Not a breast or nipple shield but shells. They were hard plastic with holes in them, kind of like a "cup" men wear in their jock strap. They did not compress my nipples but allowed any leakage to drain through the holes onto the breastpads that you use to catch leakage. I found that I leaked quite a bit which exacerbated the cracking, so by using the shells it gave my nipples a chance to "air out" while still wearing a bra for support. I was not a fan of the breast creams as it kept my nipples kind of moist. When home, I would wear my nursing bras with the flaps down and a breastpad wedged underneath to catch leakage. I found that keeping my nipples drier my cracks cleared up within a few days. I promise it will get better and it is sooo worth it. Nursing made me feel strong and powerful, my body was feeding my baby.
Also I nursed on demand. Babies are people, meaning that their eating habits can fluctuate just like "big" people. Sometimes they snack (nurse) on and off all day and night, sometimes they space it out. I did find that evenings both my kids cluster fed (ate almost every hour on the hour). It was draining literally and figuratively. Also babies have a tendancy to eat more frequently when they hit a growth spurt. Rule of thumb, is he peeing at least 12-14 diapers a day, does he seem satisfied after a feeding or does he cry or act hungry. You could check under his tongue to make sure that his frenulum is not completely connected (tongue tied), that can interfere with proper latching and often inhibits the ability of the baby to get enough breastmilk to satisfy hunger or to gain weight. Last idea, if Perseus seems stressed from trying to latch on may I suggest that you both get in a warm bath together (if ok by your Dr. for you), as long as you keep his umbilicus from getting soaking wet the water should relax both of you and Perseus may latch on easier. Okay, enough of my assvice. I am positive that you two will figure it out, after all you are an amazing team. :)
No assvice I'm afraid, I hope to experience this for myself one day! :-)
I just wanted to say that it warms my heart to hear how you feel about your son!
That is awesome. Sorry about the sore boobs though.
xoxo
think you probably got enough assvice for one day so I thought I would offer encoragement instead! I had such a hard time breastfeeding my daughter that I quit very early on. With my son, I was much more determined to make it work and I felt everything you are describing. Every time the little bugger latched on I would cringe and sometimes cry. But over the first few weeks (sorry - I wish I could write days!) it got better. Slowly, but it was better. By the end of the 1st month we were pros and I actually LIKED it! I was convinced such bliss was just a myth! And to my surprise it became the easiest way to sooth him ever. So hang in there - the bliss awaits!!!!
One of the best things my midwife had me do when G wasn't gaining in his first few days was pump and feed him an ounce or two after feeding. So I'd nurse him, and then pump and then feed him what was pumped (or if there's a friend or family that wants to help out, have them feed while you pump and save for next feeding). It made it possible to account for a guaranteed amount, plus the pumping helped the supply pick up too.
If you were able to get a new pump, this might help you out a bit.
Good Luck!
Now that I think of it, for my 2nd daughter I used plain old liquid gold - breastmilk! - on my cracked/sore/bleeding nipples. Worked much better than anything else.
Also works wonders for diaper rash, sore throat, etc. Remember the Greek father in "My Big Fat Wedding?" How he uses windex to cure every ailment? Breastmilk is my windex!! lol
Your experience sounds exactly like mine! Nipple shields saved my DD and me! You may also want to try Fenugreek herb to increase supply. Keep up the good work!
Congrats on your beautiful little boy! I've been a lurker for a while. I went through breastfeeding hell with my first and lived to tell about it (and ultimately successfully nursed for a year). So I have some assvice.
Definitely call a lactation consultant if the pain continues. Soreness is normal but anything more than that isn't and a LC can really help. A good latch is also critical to the baby being able to transfer milk successfully and hence gain weight. Here in Florida the health department has lactation consultants as part of their women, infants and children's program that will come to your house and their services are free. That was a godsend for me with my first baby. You could call the health department where you live and see if they have the same setup.
As for him getting enough, monitor his wet and dirty diapers. If he is wetting plenty and his urine is clear, he is fine in the short term. And the weight checks are important of course. Sometimes your baby will be fussy and want to nurse and nurse and you'll swear it must be because you have no milk and he must be starving but that's usually not the case. They sometimes just want to stay latched for hours, especially in the evenings, and it's normal.
Hang in there, it does get easier. Really.
I haven't read the other comments, so this may be a redundancy: but I highly recommend the La Leche League. They can help with latch and feeding issues, and go beyond to provide support for parenting in a compassionate way. At least I found their philosophy of parenting to be very in tune with my own instincts.
Once your milk comes in sometimes over-supply is an issue. I was caught unaware by that and suffered some unnecessary pain and anxiety.
Anyway, I just wanted to support your intention to breastfeed. There are some zealots, and I hope to not be that; but it's hard to not evangelize because it truly was one of the most tender and loving experiences of my life--and I hope you can have that too.
Again, congratulations
Oh! Just read Lawmommy's post. I second her comment about nursing lying down. Mastering that made everything much easier.
My only advice would be to ditch the disoposable breast pads and find some washable absorbsent cotton ones. They are breathable with no plastic covering. Granted, it makes for a little more laundry, but oh, so worth it.
No real assvice from me. I am glad your milk has come in. That should make it easier all around. I would give it a few days with that before you listen to anything a pedi says about what Perseus is getting. It sounds like you are doing great! Just remember those first couple of weeks are *really* hard but they will be over before you know it. Sometimes it helped me to just take it an hour at a time.
I used to scream "MOTHERFUCKER" at the top of my lungs each and every time he latched. It gets better. I don't know much beyond time. Lansinoh, etc. But time above all else. Hang in there. It's the best thing ever.
-Bri, Mom of a 17 month old nurser
do not be afraid of supplements. for me, fenugreek worked (and is relatively cheap, although you have to like the smell of maple syrup) as has domperidone (not cheap, but quite effective). i've had good success ordering it online from inhouse pharmacy.
and don't be afraid of a lactation consultant. they are not all equal, but a good one is worth her weight in liquid gold.
and -- SUPER CONGRATULATIONS on your gorgeous and growing family.
More nursing assvice:
The best nursing pillow by far is the my breast friend. It will save your back. I've recommended and gave mine to my friends and they all were much happier moo cows after that :)
My daughter was born with a tooth (thank you God) so I had VERY sore nips! The DR gave me lanolin tubes to try but it seemed to be a sticky mess.
The best thing that worked was the breast milk drops on the end of my nipples. Follow that with letting the girls hand out and air dry. Over time they toughen up. I remember every time one of my kids latched on my toes would curl. The meds that they sent me home with after the baby was born came in very handy. The doctor told me to take them when the nursing pain got too bad. After time they healed and nursing became one of the highlights of having my kids. I often reminisce about nursing and it's what I miss most.
Good luck...and what a beautiful baby!
more nursing assvice: time. it just takes time and the nips will be champs. Congats on doing so well with bf so far.
Just keep going. I promise it DOES get better/easier. It is SOOO worth it.
ugh - I remember the pain of the first couple weeks of nursing! I promise it will get better, though, and you'll be glad you stuck with it. Perseus is just learning how to nurse, but as time goes on his latch will improve and that will help. your nipples will also get used to the sensation of being sucked on; keep in mind that they've never had this much action!
try some warm compresses; I used to wet some towels and microwave them for about 30 seconds - it felt SOOOO good! and if your milk won't stop flowing (which was always happening to me - have you experienced the spray yet??) use a cold compress. Lansinoh or some other lanolin will help with the cracking and you don't have to worry about washing it off - it's safe for Perseus.
my final piece of ass-vice is to find your local LLL and go to a meeting. I'm assuming that you're off of work for at least a few months and they're an amazing resource for new moms. plus, it's nice to get out somewhere and not feel self-conscious if you have to nurse ;-) makes for good practice before you do it in the "real" world!
oh, and different positions might help. for example, with my daughter I found that cross-cradle killed on my right side but if I did the football hold it was fine. we only had to do that for a few weeks till my nipples got used to nursing and then primarily did cross-cradle or side-lying. anyway, good luck and stick with it - you'll do great :-)
Try:
Cold tea bags.
Lanolin.
Walking around without a shirt at all times.
Breastmilk on the sore spots.
Hope this helps!
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